Note: I found this little snippet in some old writing… circa May of last year. But might still be a valid point. For all time.
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While he’s jumping from couch to couch and walking madly, like a scientist, about the room…. Zoom asks his me, with his brother next to me…. “Mom, is the reason Mack is so literal because he has Aspergers?”
I said, “Yes, it is. It is part of Aspergers, but it is who he is too.”
“Cause when people ask if he is shooting his gun in Fortnite, he corrects them and says, ‘you mean the RPG’s’?”
So there was more to that, but unless you are a Fortnite person, it will literally make you squint and cover your eyes. So let’s suffice to say that it was a great example of a very literal person making a distinction that is somewhat or exceptionally annoying to those playing with him, possibly and potentially.
And Mack defends himself mildly. We have achieved even a small level of Nirvana where each of us can criticize or speak freely of another’s “stuff” without being too reactive…. At times. Sometimes. But more than never.
A smile finds itself sliding across my face as I continue to watch him leap wildly from couch to couch and to the table nearby while he has a conversation. I get that you’re judging my parenting right now. ‘You let him walk on the table?’
No…. I don’t. But sometimes when my brain is in mellow mode, and I am ready to relax on a Friday night, it’s like I am watching a movie instead of being in a house I am in charge of… soooo, if you can’t relate to that—just close my blog now. Right fucking now. We’re not meant to be connected in this way.
And I said out loud… “Well, I am trying to think of something you might do that’s annoying.”
My son smiled. He kept moving the whole time he smiled. He beamed for a moment. I smiled lovingly and sassily at him.
I love moments that remind me we are all learning to understand each other, life, weirdness, why gummy bears do not fall apart when they are clearly liquid!
But we are finding trust and love and acceptance. What a life we could all live if we already had those things in our homes and didn’t’ have to grow them in the proverbial garden of love. What would happen if we didn’t have to replant from the ‘dysfunctional seedlings’ more than periodically.
Well, we would be fucking inhuman. So we laugh and apologize and keep replanting, and sometimes replants die.
And on a Friday late afternoon, every once in awhile, we ask questions, we get answers, and we find compassion for others because we are all the same really. We all have “annoying” things, moments, behaviors. Obviously, this wasn’t the time for me to jump in and ask what was annoying about me. Cause then I couldn’t have written the blog post.
But stay tuned! It may be coming quickly! Soonly! Yikes.
To you and yours!
With love,
Martini Meditations