January 29, 2012

Incredibly Average Advice Recap and Thenadays or Nowadays?

And so we end this NAKED topic.  In order for us to truly tackle the next topic, we must close the last!  Here’s what I heard in person and saw on the site.  I think every mom I heard from said that they were all, if not partially, naked in front of their kids.  I love it.  retromom(I am allowed to have an opinion here.)  I felt some normalcy around naked familyness.  I think I just like the freedom of it, the idea that I don’t have to worry about one more thing being potentially inappropriate or destructive at some secret psychological level.


I had to laugh as my husband always jokes that whenever he is in the shower on the weekends, the entire family has to come in and hang out.  Of course, you realize, he is used to showering in the quiet mornings, all alone, naked without an audience.  I think the audience makes him a little uncomfortable.   And yet he has become more comfortable as he understands he will probably not win the battle.  When he’s not home every morning, bathroom time is important.  It’s important because we all get ready in the same bathroom much of the time.  It’s easier.  And we have a great big master bathroom.  I thought that implied we should hang out in there, you know, congregate. 


It’s obvious that some children have a different association or level of awareness on nakedness.  And although I couldn’t get an idea of the exact moment any child should be taken from naked family time.  I am guessing each parent has a sense and can assess when necessary. 


My very favorite comment was from Jen Toll:  I have to print again because every once awhile a swift difference of perspective puts everything in order. 

“…I have far more serious issues to keep me up at night than my kids seeing the naked human body. Like violence, drugs and general human apathy! It might not be appealing to look at me (or at least less appealing than it once was), but they should appreciate my body, it’s what brought them into this world!!” 

These comments are what I live for.  Thanks, Jen, for giving it to us for real.  I was inspired to parade my body as a type of spaceship or cocoon for the growth of beautiful little beings.  Luckily, I felt less inspired when I opened the front door naked and found it to be cold.  Oh well.  I’ll stick to naked showers when I please.  And as for my older son, I am going to communicate until it just feels weird.  Then mommy’s shower time become “mommy’s alone time.” 


Thank you all for your responses and time.  I truly seek to learn and laugh from this.  Don’t forget to click the INCREDIBLY AVERAGE ADVICE link on the left column of our website and tell us your opinion,


Thenadays or Nowadays?”

You know, I often ask this question because I wonder how it is possible that parents like my husband’s parents’ had families of 9 and 10 children, by one mother.  I marvel, I shudder, I daydream a little and then I throw up bile, because I can’t imagine that parents were able to raise that many children with outdoor toilets and washing everything by hand.  Need I mention cloth diapers?  Cloth freaking diapers!  And those big pins that can stab through flesh that fastened the diapers?  There were no sleeping pills or Moms Club because there was so much milking and farming and sewing and cooking other crap to be done.  Did all those kids provide helpers?


But then the mind draws to the current situation where we are prone to over-information, developmental milestones to reach every 30 seconds, our own careers, our own needs, highlighted above the greater good.  There is divorce and that damn “happiness” factor that confuses everything.  We have therapists and 40 schools to choose from and a million classes our children have to take to provide “fun” and to reinforce the school they are already going to.  Few of our children do chores that take more than five minutes a day, so moms now do all that other crap the kids used to do—or do we?


Which if worse?  Which is better?  Or more to the point…  Have we made parenting harder or easier?  Do our children fare better for our stronger hold on their every breath?  Do we fare better for all the knowledge and the “opportunities” available to us?  I want to know what you think.  Hell, I’d like to know what I think on this one.